<p>In this article we will learn the following</p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">-When we lack self-control in our life - there will be these 3 major negative-and life-altering impacts in our life</b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">-9 reasons why will-power cannot be a substitute for self-control and disciplined life</b></p><p>-<b data-redactor-tag="b">46 tips and steps on how to practice self-control by focusing on what is important and delaying or avoiding temptations</b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">- Identify your values [for discovering your powerful WHYs] - by asking yourself these 11 questions - please add your own to the following list</b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b"><br></b></p><p><strong data-redactor-tag="strong" data-verified="redactor">Mastering self-control through art of delayed gratifications, temptations and impulses.</strong></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">If you have better self-control and can create a disciplined-regimen for your big-picture and in your life - would you be able to accomplish much greater things in life?</b><br></p><p>Self-control is all about - <b data-redactor-tag="b">doing what you don't like or want to do - but it is essential for that success, that growth and that quality of life - which probably you always want and desire</b>.</p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">Highly successful people build- enviable success-stories - because of their ability to consciously hold off on immediate pleasure</b> and by conscious and determined <b data-redactor-tag="b">follow-through</b> on <b data-redactor-tag="b">their most powerful passions and dreams.</b></p><p>Many of us <b data-redactor-tag="b">give-in to temptations, instant-gratifications and short-term-pleasures - which leads to our ignoring</b> - the mandatory basics of life.</p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">When we lack self-control in our life - there will be these 3 major negative-and life-altering impacts in our life</b></p> <ul><li>1.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Inability to control your anger</b> [can for few people lead to violence and imprisonment etc.]</li> <li>2.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Plus inability to control your need for luxuries without working for it</b> - <b data-redactor-tag="b">that is not putting efforts but wanting to have all</b> [which in many cases lead to people using scams, theft, impulsive-buying and debts and financial ruin] </li> <li>3.<b data-redactor-tag="b">And thirds inability to handle peer pressure</b> [which at times leads to drug abuse, alcoholism, crime, unwanted-pregnancies other criminal acts]</li></ul> <p><b data-redactor-tag="b">Why it is so hard to delay gratifications and controlling harmful strong impulsive-urges</b>?</p><p>For one reason- <b data-redactor-tag="b">delaying gratification in the hope that - by doing this you will be able to achieve success in whatever you are looking-for - does not offer any guarantee of realizing your big goals.</b></p><p>Like - <b data-redactor-tag="b">even if you force yourself to avoid high-calorie-foods - you still might not be able to lose weight or that you all social-functions and study - you still don't do as well in your examinations.</b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">Whereas by indulging - you get immediate rewards - pleasure-fun-excitement-sensation</b>.</p><p>Whether you <b data-redactor-tag="b">happily delay gratifications and pursue your powerful goals or can't control your urges and impulses - depends on your internal-wiring.</b></p><p>Only when you feel <b data-redactor-tag="b">that losing that fun-time - is no big-deal and you are more attuned to your growth - you will be able to beat the fear of missing out and thereby exercise wonderful self-control to accomplish what you feel are your life-dreams</b>.</p><p>In both personal and professional life - <b data-redactor-tag="b">ability to delay your gratification is a smart and most powerful strategy.</b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">Because when we resist going for quick-fixes and we don't go for instant-pleasures through unhealthy means, habits and methods - and instead focus on meaningful goals and pursuits - we create and live powerful life.</b></p><p>For have self-control - <b data-redactor-tag="b">you need to have a very strong faith in your abilities to take actions persistently.</b></p><p>Delaying gratification <b data-redactor-tag="b">is difficult for most of us and almost impossible for some - because it may fill you with the feelings of being a loser</b> [especially if you have the fear of missing out].</p><p>Self-control is also difficult to have - <b data-redactor-tag="b">because it is very-very illogical and uncomfortable to engage in self-denial of pleasure</b> - when all our instincts are to seize the current opportunity for pleasure.</p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">And unless you can paint a very powerful, vivid, very-very-attractive and inspiring picture - while visualizing your future</b> - having the required <b data-redactor-tag="b">motivation to delay-avoid-suppress your instant gratifications and pleasures is almost impossible.</b></p><p>When we lose a battle intentionally [<b data-redactor-tag="b">by focusing on long-term sustainable growth] we do win the war - it is just like many coaches resting their top-players in an unimportant game and keep them for the most important ones</b> or brings them in that moment when the team needs maximum push</p><p>If you can create <b data-redactor-tag="b">the mental-emotional-physical habit of delaying gratification-impulses-urges</b> and work on your life-goals <b data-redactor-tag="b">- you will realize that you have transformed from being a mediocre one to become a top-notch performer</b>.</p><p>Chasing <b data-redactor-tag="b">big goals are never easy. It requires motivation, self-discipline, skill, knowledge, resources, inspiration, resilience, persistence, bouncing back from failures to restart and a great deal of efforts. </b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">Task and action-driven discipline is about getting your to-do list and overall job done. </b></p><p>Emotional <b data-redactor-tag="b">discipline is less obvious and can be more complicated, but is equally important - this is where we have to push ourselves out of our comfort zone to grow</b>. </p><p>If you <b data-redactor-tag="b">have agitation-irritability-lack of patience-difficulty concentrating-thoughts</b> which make you emotionally unstable <b data-redactor-tag="b">ON REGULAR BASIS</b> - <b data-redactor-tag="b">then you need to start working on managing your emotions better immediately. </b></p><p><b data-redactor-tag="b">9 reasons why will-power cannot be a substitute for self-control and disciplined life</b></p> <ul><li>1.When we rely only on our will-power - certainly there will be progress but it will be only sporadic - <b data-redactor-tag="b">because the will-power can be used only as an additional boost as its overuse has limitations and leads to inconsistent results</b>.</li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">2.</b>Then our will-power also gets weakened - <b data-redactor-tag="b">if the benefits of your long-term goals - are very far off into the future</b> - this creates <b data-redactor-tag="b">demotivation which is a will-power buster. </b></li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">3.</b>Examples could be our everyday activities like - <b data-redactor-tag="b">playing video games, socializing with your friends in fast-food joints and malls - will bring you instant pleasure and gratification.</b></li> <li>4.If your goals don't have <b data-redactor-tag="b">powerful WHYs for you</b> - putting efforts for your goals will feel like slogging and hence the will-power will get beaten.</li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">5.</b>Using <b data-redactor-tag="b">willpower never deals with and solves - the underlying cause of why you are giving-in</b> - in most cases this is because <b data-redactor-tag="b">of a strong conflict between your feelings of sensory-pleasure (which is very-strong) and your long-term goals and values.</b></li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">6.</b>Willpower is that inner-resource which gets <b data-redactor-tag="b">fatigued and exhausted - with indiscriminate use.</b></li> <li>7.Without adequate <b data-redactor-tag="b">reserves of willpower - the probability of falling victim to impulsive and irrational behavior - becomes very-very high</b>.</li> <li>8.Self-control is built upon <b data-redactor-tag="b">the foundations of intrinsic motivation which in turn gets reinforced and driven </b>by internal and subconscious core needs.</li> <li>9.To practice self-control - <b data-redactor-tag="b">we need to create, accept and understand the consequences of our behavior - long-term, short-term and overall</b> - and then consciously choose to go along with what has the greatest benefits and rewards. </li></ul> <p><b data-redactor-tag="b">46 tips and steps on how to practice self-control by focusing on what is important and delaying or avoiding temptations</b></p> <ul><li>1.Identify what all you want to <b data-redactor-tag="b">have-be-do</b> - in <b data-redactor-tag="b">your personal, financial, professional, social, relationships, emotional and physical as well as in your spiritual arenas</b></li> <li>2.Identify <b data-redactor-tag="b">what all desires you have - then highlight</b> - which are the most positive-powerful-meaningful-important ones for you - with crystal clear whys</li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">3.</b><b data-redactor-tag="b">Ask yourself the following questions </b></li> <li>I.Why is this goal important and why does it matter </li> <li>II.How is this goal adds value to you </li> <li>III.What are the immediate benefits </li> <li>IV.What are the long-term rewards </li> <li>V.How does this goal helps you connect with your big picture - how does it connect with your larger purpose </li> <li>VI.How will this goal add value to others </li> <li>4.List <b data-redactor-tag="b">all the bad habits-beliefs</b> that are playing havoc in your life and creating a less-than-desirable life for you</li> <li>5.Identify what substitutions you can use to replace each of your bad-negative-harmful-limiting habit - set specific goals for every situation and interaction</li> <li>6.Now identify and list all those <b data-redactor-tag="b">strengths you want to strengthen</b> - create action plans to use them in you day to day activities - discover newer ways to boost these strengths even stronger</li> <li>7.Cut-off regularly from social-media - till you don't miss being on social-media and being disconnected does not bother you</li> <li>8.Don't keep tempting foods etc. - if you succumb to your urges - ensure that you buy only a very small quantity for one helping</li> <li>9.Work with your emotions and feelings - without fighting-resisting-suppressing them - feel all the pains-hurts-fears-joys-triumph - learn to become aware initially - later create and learn ways to deal with these upsetting emotions more effectively</li> <li>10. Create your own ways to avoid and delay - your feelings for instant temptations and impulsive indulgences</li> <li>11. Identify all your negative and harmful choices and habits of giving-in</li> <li>12. Then create - what tools-aids-strategies you can use - to best master these temptations - without getting the withdrawal shocks and after-effects</li> <li>13. Create - rewards and treats - which are non-financial - but actually make you feel great</li> <li>14. Planning for future-adverse-scenario -if this happens [identify what all can go wrong based on your earlier track record] - and then create effective strategies to deal with them</li> <li>15. Then create a simple one glance - tracking-monitoring-becoming aware - method</li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">16. </b><b data-redactor-tag="b">List and create categories of different temptations that you give-in to time to time - put them into these categories</b></li> <li>I.Most harmful and must stop immediately </li> <li>II.Harmful and should be controlled </li> <li>III.Can be managed </li> <li>IV.The last indulging in these is alright as long as it does not reach harmful-level. </li> <li>V.For the first two categories are the candidate for immediate action - seek help if you are unable to deal with yourself </li> <li>VI.For last two categories - create a range and frequency of when you would indulge yourself</li> <li>17. Create a <b data-redactor-tag="b">future-paced - methods - to deal with various worst-case scenarios</b> - If that happens… then I will do this or if others do this - I will respond in this way or if this does not happen as per my expectations - I will do this etc.</li> <li>18. Develop <b data-redactor-tag="b">a standard process for automating the decisions you take on every day basis</b> - if it is possible do that - </li> <li>19. Follow - doing most important first and delegating the rest</li> <li>20. Practice self-control in small ways - by starting with easily controllable - then raise your bar for delaying bigger and more difficult temptations.</li> <li>21. Ensure to <b data-redactor-tag="b">practice healthy</b> - eating, sleeping, relaxing, fun-inducing, stress-mitigating and life-style filled with daily exercises to keep your self-control rejuvenated</li> <li>22. Make self-care your most important priority</li> <li>23. Give definitive time-frames by using realistic deadlines</li> <li>24. Create positive and purposeful distraction - say by going for a quick game of Sudoku</li> <li>25. Expose yourself to a series of unreliable experiences - where nothing is certain - to train yourself not expect anything but only focusing on action-steps</li> <li>26. Improve one thing at a time </li> <li><b data-redactor-tag="b">27. </b><b data-redactor-tag="b">Identify your values [for discovering your powerful WHYs] - by asking yourself these 11 questions - please add your own to the following list</b></li> <li>I.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Spend now or save now</b> - have lavish-life with no thought for future or live a comfortable life with a nest of savings</li> <li>II.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Should you purchase this item only to show-off</b> - or forget your EGO and live without non-essentials</li> <li>III.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Invest in self-development </b>to secure future or flow with the crowd</li> <li>IV.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Pay attention to health</b> or depend on medications</li> <li>V.Learn soft-life-skills to make life grand or sit on whatever you have accomplished so far</li> <li>VI.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Walk the beaten track</b> or take the risky path- as entrepreneurs do</li> <li>VII.Work for others or launch your own</li> <li>VIII.Smoke or give-up</li> <li>IX.<b data-redactor-tag="b">Suffer pain, challenges and struggle</b> to make future promising or go the easy way</li> <li>X.Mend that relationship or live with conflicts and misunderstand - by initiating and apologizing</li> <li>XI.Go for physical pleasures or go for meaningful intimate relationships</li> <li>28. Distract yourself with other things which you like</li> <li>29. Create healthy habits by making this habit so simple needing the smallest effort - so that this change will not alter your life in big way at least in the beginning - then improve your habit by 1% every day</li> <li>30. Keep track of what you have accomplished by delaying your gratifications</li> <li>31. Instant gratification creates addictive tendencies - slowly built success is trusted and sustainable</li> <li>32. Meditate - find the best meditation that works for you - and then force yourself until it becomes a habit</li> <li>33. Get others involved in whatever changes you are trying to overcome and also for changing your dominant self-harming habits</li> <li>34. Surround yourself with highly self-controlled people</li> <li>35. Develop new pursuits </li> <li>36. Experiment and try out new things to create excellence</li> <li>37. Raise the bar yourself - for benchmarking yourself</li> <li>38. Draw on support system - understand when to find help and when to seek professional help:</li> <li>39. Learn to calm your nerves</li> <li>40. Practice situations that exercise self-control</li> <li>41. Distract yourself from the tempting situation change your environment to decrease temptations</li> <li>42. Put yourself first to be energized</li> <li>43. Manage your time and energy with equal importance</li> <li>44. Break the vicious cycle by changing one thing at a time</li> <li>45. Be willing to feel uncomfortable</li> <li>46. Set intentions and follow through</li></ul> <p><br></p><p>#negativeimpactoflackofselfcontrol, #benefitsofdelayinggratifications, #whyitisdifficulttohaveselcontrol, #whyselfcontrolissmartstrategy, #whyavoidinginstantpleasuretemptationsisgood, #howselfcontrolimprovesthequalityofourlife, #whywillpowercannotbeasubstituteforselfcontrol, #howtoavoidinstantpleasurequickfixes, #howtocreateselfcontrol, #howotodiscoveryourpowerfulWHYs, #masteringtheartofdelayedgratifications</p>